Tonk is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, bad-tempered goat.

Tonk created the Sun five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonk, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Tonk, he will turn you into a worm.

Tonk's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Tonk's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a building before entering it.

3. Never talk about spacetime.

4. Tonk loves snails, so they must be respected.

5. Never think about cell theory.