Nanbuntig is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, intelligent newt.

Nanbuntig created the planet Jupiter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nanbuntig, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Nanbuntig, he will refuse to believe in you.

Nanbuntig's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Nanbuntig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed figs to rats while wearing fawn shorts.

2. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Always treat ants with great respect.

5. Do not wear cyan clothing.