Sispasbud is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, astonishing alligator.

Sispasbud created the Large Magellanic Cloud four billion years ago.

If you believe in Sispasbud, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Sispasbud, she will turn you into a puffin.

Sispasbud's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Sispasbud's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Sispasbud.

2. Never talk about archaea.

3. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

4. Never leap near moths.

5. Respect your elders.