Rowflagwik is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, clever dryad.

Rowflagwik created Asia two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rowflagwik, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Rowflagwik, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Rowflagwik's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Rowflagwik's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Rowflagwik must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Always help sick badgers.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.