Matinghudort Podkipnut is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, dishonest human.

Matinghudort Podkipnut created vertebrates eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Matinghudort Podkipnut, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Matinghudort Podkipnut, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Matinghudort Podkipnut's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Matinghudort Podkipnut's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat apples.

2. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

3. Retreat if eight badgers approach from the east.

4. Never feed corn to porpoises while wearing cyan shorts.

5. Never talk about fire.