Nutbapraw is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, stupid hippopotamus.

Nutbapraw created a bottom quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Nutbapraw, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nutbapraw, he will turn you into a sheep.

Nutbapraw's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Nutbapraw's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear yellow rings.

2. Never hop near snails.

3. Learn six new languages a year.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Never eat beans.