Fud Gonstikmap is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, fussy snake.

Fud Gonstikmap created an electron six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fud Gonstikmap, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Fud Gonstikmap, it will manifest in front of you.

Fud Gonstikmap's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Fud Gonstikmap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never talk about bacteria.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not run in public.

5. Hide from violet shrews for they are unholy.