Bugnutvan is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, grumpy crow.

Bugnutvan created Mount Everest six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bugnutvan, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Bugnutvan, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Bugnutvan's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Bugnutvan's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Bugnutvan in the centre of the settlement.

2. Worship no other gods but Bugnutvan.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never write about comets.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Bugnutvan.