Donlinnull Jipdidrip is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, witless porpoise.

Donlinnull Jipdidrip created a strange quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Donlinnull Jipdidrip, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Donlinnull Jipdidrip, she will turn you into a dog.

Donlinnull Jipdidrip's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Donlinnull Jipdidrip's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into brown rooms.

2. Donlinnull Jipdidrip must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Never mention voles.

4. Never paint your arms turquoise.

5. Donlinnull Jipdidrip loves great tits, so they must be respected.