Nuryarlvonk is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, ruthless wasp.

Nuryarlvonk created gold four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nuryarlvonk, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nuryarlvonk, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Nuryarlvonk's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Nuryarlvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Nuryarlvonk's name in vain.

2. You must love Nuryarlvonk.

3. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.

4. Do not dye your hair mauve.

5. Never look at moons.