Fasnab Nurgadcad is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, humorless bee.

Fasnab Nurgadcad created Africa six million years ago.

If you believe in Fasnab Nurgadcad, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fasnab Nurgadcad, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Fasnab Nurgadcad's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Fasnab Nurgadcad's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak at midnight.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate mice.

3. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.

4. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.

5. Never handle lead while unclean.