Yimbonkpad is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, pitiless gorilla.

Yimbonkpad created time and space three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yimbonkpad, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Yimbonkpad, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Yimbonkpad's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Yimbonkpad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Yimbonkpad must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Do not run in public.

4. Never paint your neck purple.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.