Natjanlinhab is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, unjust zebra.

Natjanlinhab created the planet Venus five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Natjanlinhab, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Natjanlinhab, he will turn you into a frog.

Natjanlinhab's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Natjanlinhab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about chlorophyll.

2. Do not eat spinach.

3. Ducks are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not dye your hair mauve.

5. You must love Natjanlinhab.