Yokladzed is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, emotional duck.

Yokladzed created the Milkyway seven million years ago.

If you believe in Yokladzed, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Yokladzed, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Yokladzed's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Yokladzed's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

2. Hide if six otters approach from the east.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never talk about thermodynamics near goats while wearing indigo shoes and balancing four titanium spheres on your hands.

5. Always help sick hamsters.