Boprawmif is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, omnipotent dove.

Boprawmif created an up quark eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Boprawmif, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Boprawmif, he will ignore you.

Boprawmif's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Boprawmif's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics near rats while wearing magenta corsets and balancing five platinum spheres on your back.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Boprawmif on top of all buildings.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate snails.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.