Tipyartlop is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, humane dragonfly.

Tipyartlop created light five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tipyartlop, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tipyartlop, he will turn you into a goat.

Tipyartlop's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Tipyartlop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat corn.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near sharks while wearing magenta corsets.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Tipyartlop.

5. Never think ill of sick foxes.