Cissdossvin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, passionate meerkat.

Cissdossvin created carbon four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cissdossvin, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Cissdossvin, it will make you grow a tail.

Cissdossvin's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Cissdossvin's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of grapes to rats while wearing mauve tights.

2. Feed all hungry seals.

3. Do not wear gray clothing.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never mention sheep.