Big is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, pitiless ant.

Big created matter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Big, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Big, it will turn you into a plant.

Big's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Big's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Worship no other gods but Big.

5. Fast once a month.
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