Pogyartpin is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, grumpy walrus.

Pogyartpin created life seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pogyartpin, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Pogyartpin, she will destroy your home solar system.

Pogyartpin's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Pogyartpin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

2. You must love Pogyartpin.

3. Never look at comets.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Erect three zinc sculptures of Pogyartpin on top of important buildings.