Sompanjin is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, humane wyvern.

Sompanjin created energy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sompanjin, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sompanjin, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Sompanjin's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Sompanjin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat garlic.

2. Do not take Sompanjin's name in vain.

3. Do not speak about turnips.

4. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

5. Never play with disobedient children.