Migsatsom is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, overgenerous snail.

Migsatsom created the Large Magellanic Cloud two million years ago.

If you believe in Migsatsom, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Migsatsom, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Migsatsom's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Migsatsom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat strawberries.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Always pray immersed in water.

4. You must love Migsatsom.

5. Erect a giant red sculpture of Migsatsom in the centre of the settlement.