Konortmip is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, flying giraffe.

Konortmip created the universe eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Konortmip, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Konortmip, she will turn you into a tree.

Konortmip's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Konortmip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in green rooms.

2. Birds are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never skip in the presence of badgers.

5. Run away if three ants approach from the south.