Pasfadcan is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, bad-tempered troll.

Pasfadcan created a quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Pasfadcan, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Pasfadcan, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Pasfadcan's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Pasfadcan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Do not dye your hair violet.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.