Tabhabbap is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, blissful goose.

Tabhabbap created humankind three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tabhabbap, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tabhabbap, she will refuse to believe in you.

Tabhabbap's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Tabhabbap's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if four horses approach from the east.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. You must never eat nuts.

4. Pray towards the north.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate otters.