Farnlak is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, awe-inspiring badger.

Farnlak created the Whirlpool Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Farnlak, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Farnlak, it will come to you in dreams.

Farnlak's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Farnlak's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Do not keep four snails in a large pit.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.