Gabmongad is a god.
It takes the form of an exceedingly large, fussy
guinea pig.
Gabmongad created vertebrates nine billion years ago.
If you believe in
Gabmongad, it will ignore you.
If you do not believe in
Gabmongad, it will remove you from existence.
Gabmongad's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.
Gabmongad's Holy Commandments1. Never mention horses.
2. Never wear shorts.
3. Do not make images of living things.
4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.
5. Gabmongad must be the most important thing in your life.