Bepstigfag is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, capable mongoose.

Bepstigfag created the planet Jupiter six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bepstigfag, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bepstigfag, she will jump up and down on your head.

Bepstigfag's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Bepstigfag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Do not wear gray clothing.

4. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Bepstigfag loves aardvarks, so they must be honoured.