Nutwigmit Veenfatfod Fotmapxin is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, unsympathetic squirrel.

Nutwigmit Veenfatfod Fotmapxin created the Tadpole Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nutwigmit Veenfatfod Fotmapxin, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nutwigmit Veenfatfod Fotmapxin, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Nutwigmit Veenfatfod Fotmapxin's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Nutwigmit Veenfatfod Fotmapxin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Never look at comets.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Never think about quantum field theory near geese while wearing black rings and balancing four iron spheres on your neck.