Hotkopcet Tamgesscit Gudlistsit is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, quiet gnu.

Hotkopcet Tamgesscit Gudlistsit created a strange quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Hotkopcet Tamgesscit Gudlistsit, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Hotkopcet Tamgesscit Gudlistsit, he will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Hotkopcet Tamgesscit Gudlistsit's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Hotkopcet Tamgesscit Gudlistsit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. You must never eat bread.

3. Run away if seven dolphins approach from the west.

4. Do not eat peanuts.

5. Always take life seriously.