Bogcidbam is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, staggering swallow.

Bogcidbam created dark matter eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bogcidbam, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Bogcidbam, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Bogcidbam's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Bogcidbam's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry sheep.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Worship no other gods but Bogcidbam.

4. Always wear violet.

5. Never pour water over plants.