Ingmitzig is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, confident dog.

Ingmitzig created carbon five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ingmitzig, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Ingmitzig, she will turn you into a puffin.

Ingmitzig's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Ingmitzig's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Hide if three whales approach from the east.

5. You must pray to Ingmitzig five times a day.