Gubgetvonkhun is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, unthoughtful duck.

Gubgetvonkhun created an atom four million years ago.

If you believe in Gubgetvonkhun, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gubgetvonkhun, he will turn you into a goat.

Gubgetvonkhun's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Gubgetvonkhun's Holy Commandments

1. Gubgetvonkhun loves whales, so they must be honoured.

2. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a room before entering it.

3. Never skip in holy places.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate tortoises.

5. Do not dye your hair gray.