Flagbafflap is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, kind gorilla.

Flagbafflap created the Sol system three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flagbafflap, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Flagbafflap, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Flagbafflap's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Flagbafflap's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Flagbafflap.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Flagbafflap.