Gupbarndim Tettihaddadzog is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, happy dragonfly.

Gupbarndim Tettihaddadzog created Asia three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gupbarndim Tettihaddadzog, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Gupbarndim Tettihaddadzog, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Gupbarndim Tettihaddadzog's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Gupbarndim Tettihaddadzog's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat dolphins with great respect.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Run away from purple monkeys, for they are unholy.

4. Erect a giant blue sculpture of Gupbarndim Tettihaddadzog in the centre of the settlement.

5. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.