Kadjanarfgunflapxen is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, passionate walrus.

Kadjanarfgunflapxen created energy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Kadjanarfgunflapxen, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Kadjanarfgunflapxen, she will have a low opinion of you.

Kadjanarfgunflapxen's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Kadjanarfgunflapxen's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured monkeys.

2. Never mention geese.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Kadjanarfgunflapxen.

4. Never hop near bats.

5. Eagles are unholy and should not be approached.