Fadbitkikcar is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, calm eagle.

Fadbitkikcar created a bottom quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fadbitkikcar, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Fadbitkikcar, he will make you grow a tail.

Fadbitkikcar's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Fadbitkikcar's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Never go into gray rooms.

3. Never write about archaea.

4. Always wear mauve.

5. Never chant near mice.