Pibdamven is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, all-knowing hippopotamus.

Pibdamven created everything that exists five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pibdamven, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Pibdamven, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Pibdamven's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Pibdamven's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

2. Never wear hats.

3. Do not shave your hands.

4. Do not take Pibdamven's name in vain.

5. Learn four new languages a year.