Cussbogfat is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, generous aardvark.

Cussbogfat created the Sun four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cussbogfat, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Cussbogfat, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Cussbogfat's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Cussbogfat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never think ill of sick geese.

3. Learn eight new languages a year.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.