Ortfitcib is a god.

It takes the form of a six hundred metre long, bad-tempered dugong.

Ortfitcib created silver five million years ago.

If you believe in Ortfitcib, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Ortfitcib, it will send you a sign.

Ortfitcib's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Ortfitcib's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Ortfitcib must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Never think about spacetime near birds while wearing pink stockings and balancing five iron spheres on your neck.

5. Never wear dresses.