Sabstan is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, intelligent dryad.

Sabstan created tapeworms seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Sabstan, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Sabstan, he will turn you into a rock.

Sabstan's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Sabstan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.

5. Never write about ultrasonics.