Kippodkabtitmabbarn is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, cheerful troll.

Kippodkabtitmabbarn created a charm quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Kippodkabtitmabbarn, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Kippodkabtitmabbarn, it will manifest in front of you.

Kippodkabtitmabbarn's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Kippodkabtitmabbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never feed lentils to birds while wearing rings.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Erect a giant platinum sculpture of Kippodkabtitmabbarn in the centre of the settlement.

5. Do not commit murder.