Govenjigwigjadyik is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, ruthless dove.

Govenjigwigjadyik created light six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Govenjigwigjadyik, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Govenjigwigjadyik, she will send you a sign.

Govenjigwigjadyik's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Govenjigwigjadyik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill manatees.

2. Never mention pigs.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Govenjigwigjadyik.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Do not make images of living things.