Nilxemlabmin is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, intelligent crocodile.

Nilxemlabmin created a charm quark two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nilxemlabmin, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nilxemlabmin, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Nilxemlabmin's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Nilxemlabmin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Never eat cherries.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. You must pray to Nilxemlabmin eight times a day.

5. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.