Larnduss is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, charitable crab.

Larnduss created the world four million years ago.

If you believe in Larnduss, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Larnduss, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Larnduss' most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Larnduss' Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about nematodes.

2. Feed all hungry mites.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Never mention aardvarks.

5. Eagles are unholy and should not be approached.