Ranlarpwon is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, awesome hydra.

Ranlarpwon created the Cigar Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Ranlarpwon, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Ranlarpwon, it will turn you into a hamster.

Ranlarpwon's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Ranlarpwon's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate grasshopers.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Ranlarpwon.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Ranlarpwon must be the most important thing in your life.