Cethotbug is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, omniscient naga.

Cethotbug created the Cigar Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Cethotbug, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cethotbug, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Cethotbug's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Cethotbug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear titanium on your body.

2. Erect eight platinum sculptures of Cethotbug on top of important buildings.

3. Put Cethotbug first in all things.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not take Cethotbug's name in vain.