Sand is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, unsympathetic ferret.

Sand created gold three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sand, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Sand, it will send two she bears to sort you out.

Sand's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Sand's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Sand in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never think about chlorophyll.

4. Learn three new languages a year.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.