Dussgudfas is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, caring hamster.

Dussgudfas created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Dussgudfas, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Dussgudfas, he will turn you into a plant.

Dussgudfas' most sacred site is Edenryd in Sweden.

Dussgudfas' Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not drink alcohol.