Vegyatbarnwot is a god.

She takes the form of a slender, merciful toad.

Vegyatbarnwot created Europe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Vegyatbarnwot, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Vegyatbarnwot, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Vegyatbarnwot's most sacred site is Goldcliff in Wales.

Vegyatbarnwot's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about galaxies.

2. Learn three new languages a year.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Hide if six shrews approach from the east.

5. Do not drink alcohol.