Cuddamlin Narhubzen is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, loving porpoise.

Cuddamlin Narhubzen created the planet Jupiter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Cuddamlin Narhubzen, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Cuddamlin Narhubzen, she will send you a sign.

Cuddamlin Narhubzen's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Cuddamlin Narhubzen's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate bats.